Pancakes or Waffles Part 1
Welcome to the first installment of a new series I like to call, pancakes or waffles, based on the game of the same name. The idea is as follows. I post up 2 animals and y'all have to tell me which one you want to remove from earth forever. This can be done in the comments section or with a megafone in Times Square or some other "sensitive" location. The "winner" is then removed from earth forever and hence can no longer participate in "Pancakes or Waffles."
We'll start out easy.
In this corner... the river otter.
Nice towel buddy. Did you get that in a happy meal? And nice face too. Grummpphh.
I'll weigh out some pros and cons to help your decision:
Pro: looks dumb, helps cuteness.
Con: Slippery fur makes for easy escape. And what's the point of not anihilating them if you can't even hold on to one.
Pro: Limitlessly loving eyes.
And in the blue trunks we have....Sea Otter. Definately more inclined to eat a clam (if you know what I mean.)
Pro: this is practicly and unfair advantage, 69ing baby on belly.
Con: Sea otters always look like they were just dragged out of an oil spill.
Pro: Baby is sleeping.
Con: Doesn't that possition hurt your stomach mussels?
Sorry that last one was a question, not a con.
That's it. The choice is up to you. GO!
20 Comments:
Don't. Make. Me. Choose.
I'm begging.
3:32 PM
Sea otter stays. Better whiskers. Doesn't need help towel drying. Uses stomach for smashing shellfish. Eats sushi a la tumtum. Is salty. Ol' salts. Yeh. Sea otters.
5:17 PM
sea otter.
mainly cuz it freaks me out how well they use their hands to beat stones against clams to get to their food.
too human like. in the zoos they do this, then look atchoo like, "dude. do you mind?"
that's just eerie.
Sea otters. BAM!
5:55 PM
sea otters. where do they hide the children after they steal their beachballs.
7:35 PM
River otter, no question. Saw one loping merrily through a stream behind a Burger King once and it was so adorable and huggable that our Whoppers were forgotten.
8:08 PM
we clearly have to clarify the rules here. Let's go with: a vote is a vote to KEEP the animal. K?
8:54 PM
This is absolutely impossible, and it is going to haunt me for days.
9:50 PM
Waffles.
11:25 PM
River Otter must stay. So. Cute. Cannot. Resist. His. Gamboling.
12:50 AM
River otter has gotta stay. So full of fluff and chub.
1:39 AM
keep river otter. the humongous tail-like appendage on the sea otter grosses me out.
2:29 AM
Sea Otter
3:14 AM
The river otter must stay!
Sea otters are too huge to be cute. They are sort of scary, actually.
3:23 AM
Sea otter must stay!
5:33 AM
river odder
10:40 AM
River Otter
12:33 PM
sea otter for reals.
1:22 PM
Sea otter.
Nature isn't there to be cute and snuggle with you. As evidenced by the photo, Nature is there to be raw and 69 in public and be a little uglier than you'd like. Sea otter gets that. Sea otter doesn't have to appease Western society and it's prescribed shallow measures of which mr. fuzzykins is the cutest. fuck that! Sea otter is in your face and is cool with making you feel just a little uncomfortable. Because that's life, asshole, and sea otter is the kind of artist that brings that home.
3:34 PM
So, my question is, why do you have to "eliminate" one species from the Earth? I rather play this with politicians, not animals..
4:27 PM
audrina, it's the bittersweet pain of losing the animal you love that really makes "pancakes or waffles" the hard-hitting simulation of life's agony that we know and cherish.
river otter, cause we all know the sea is no place for a decent, god-fearing otter.
9:29 PM
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